Allegiant: If She was There
by The-New-Allegiant
Summary: This is an alternate ending of Allegiant. I keep the story almost the same as Veronica Roth's story, but make one big change, Tris lives. This continues from chapter 51 page 489 will add more tomorrow! (NY time)
1. alternate Chapter 51

This continues from Veronica Roth's novel _Allegiant _chapter Fifty-one page 489. Everything else happened exactly the way it had before.

We walk through the abandoned security checkpoint and no one stops. I see Cara standing on the other side. Her face is badly bruised and there is a bandage on her head, but she is not what concerns me. What concerns me is the expression she has on; it's a troubled look.

"What is it?" I say.

She shakes her head.

"Tris, where is she" I say.

"Tobias, I'm so sorry."

"Sorry about what?" Says Christina roughly. "What _happened_? Tell us what it was!"

"Instead of Caleb it was Tris who went into the weapons lab," says Cara. "She survived the Death serum, and set off the memory serum, but David… Shot her. And she's unresponsive."

Most of the time I know when someone is lying, though I hope she is I can tell she isn't. But Tris will be fine, she always is. If she could handle the death serum she won't let a bullet hurt her. Soon she'll be as good as new, her cheeks flushed, her eyes bright, and her body full of energy, strength and power. Then the reality of what happened to Uriah sinks in.

"She's going to be okay, right?" Christina says, more than asking. "No way. No way is this happening to two of my last few friends."

Cara stays silent, not answering Christina's question.

Christina yells something, but her voice sounds far away, like I am in another world. Everyone's faces begin to disappear, smearing into one big dull smudge of color.

All I can do is stand still- like I'm frozen, like a statue as if it can make it all go away, but it can't. It happened. No matter how hard I tried to keep her safe from her own selflessness.


	2. Chapter 52

"Where is she?" Christina demands.

"She's in one of the secure rooms at the hospital." Cara says so lightly it's almost a whisper.

I'm still standing there, frozen when Christina grabs my arm and drags me toward the hospital. I walk in her footsteps, her eager to get to Tris's side, while I don't want to face the truth. We walk through smudges that resemble hallways and I hear noises even though my ears feel like they are stuffed with cotton balls.

She lies in a bed her head in a bandage, and another on her arm. She has a mountain of pillows beneath her head and a blanket over her body. She looks so peaceful like she is asleep, but when I gently touch her arm she doesn't wake up and I don't see her bright eyes or her beautiful smile and she doesn't press her mouth to mine for a kiss. She just lies there looking still and peaceful while she's connected to machines that make beeping noises.

I can't stand it any longer, so I walk out that place, the place where my Tris is unconscious because of David. Christina reaches out for me, but knows better and returns to watching Tris.

I walk around the compound without any sense of direction passing people with blurs in place of their faces. I don't hear anything but a ringing in my ears. I was there when she went to spy on Kang, give herself up to Jeanine, to find the abnegation information, but this time I trusted her. I trusted her to make the right decision, but I should have known Caleb would not be the one to enter the weapons lab. When I finally stop walking the cuffs of my sleeves, used to dry my cheeks, are damp, and my jaw aches.


	3. Chapter 53

All I saw was a blur of gray when she first hit the net. I pulled her toward me her hand small, but warm, and then standing before me a short, thin, plain and very unremarkable- except she was the first to jump. It was the stiff who jumped first.

I hadn't even jumped first.

Her bright eyes were stern and persistent.

They were beautiful.

That wasn't the first time I had ever seen her though. I had seen her at school walking in the halls, at the false funeral for my mother and walking the streets as an abnegation. I noticed her, but I didn't see her; no one saw her for who she was until she jumped.

But a fire that burns so bright can't go out. It isn't possible.


	4. Chapter 54

I go to see her…sometime. I don't know how long it is after my first visit. This time the journey to the hospital is easier. I can tell where the floor ends and the walls begin, but the ringing in my ears remains.

I notice she has been moved from a secure room to one with a viewing window, like Uriah, who has still not been unplugged. As I enter the room I hope to see something different than I saw the last time, but all I see is Christina sitting beside the same painful image of Tris I had previously seen. Lying there like she's asleep, but when you go to touch her she doesn't move, she doesn't flinch, she just stays there in her deep sleep from which she might not wake up from.

Christina brushes a piece of Tris's stray hair behind her ear and adjusts her pillows. I know I shouldn't, I know I will fall to pieces when I do, just like last time, but I just have to. I reach out for her hand and squeeze. Hoping it will wake her, hoping she will feel it and let her know that I need her, I need her awake.

When I finally realize that it's not going to happen I loose myself. I fall to my knees and I want to cry, maybe I do, but all I can think about is how I should have been there, I should have saved her, I should have gotten to her before David had the chance to ruin her.


	5. Chapter 55

In the days to follow its movement, not stillness that helps to keep my emotions at bay, so I walk the halls instead of sleeping. I watch everyone else recover from the memory serum which had permanently altered them.

Those lost in the serums haze were gathered into groups and told the truth: that human nature is complex and all of our genes are different, but none are pure and none are damaged. They are given only one lie: their loss of memory was because of an accident, and they were about to ask the government for equality of GDs and GPs.

I keep getting stifled by the company of others, but hurt by the loneliness when I leave them. I am terrified because if I loose her I will loose everything. My hands are shaking when I stop at the control room to watch the city. Johanna is getting transportation for those wanting to leave the city. When they come here they will learn the truth. I wonder what will happen to the ones who stay in Chicago. I don't think I care.

I watch for a few minutes shoving my hands in my pockets. Then I walk away, keeping my mind busy by trying to match my footsteps to my heartbeat or avoiding cracks in tiles. When I walk to the entrance there is a small group of people gathered around the sculpture. I notice one in a wheelchair- Nita.

I walk past the vacant security barrier and watch them as I keep my distance. Reggie opens the valve at the bottom of the water tank and the amount of water flowing out begins to increase until the water gushes out, soaking the stone slab and the bottom of Reggie's pants.

"Tobias?"

A shiver runs up my spine. It's Caleb. I turn away, hoping to escape.

"Wait" he says.

I don't want to look at him, to see how much he cares for her, and I don't want to think about how she let herself suffer for this coward, about how he is not worth her getting… hurt.

But I look at him. His hair is unwashed, and unkempt, his eyes bloodshot and his mouth beginning to frown.

"I don't mean to bother you" he says. "But I have something to tell you. Something… _she_ told me to tell you before…" his eyes begin to water, but he stands up straight. "That she didn't want to leave you"

All I feel is anger. "She did survive and she _is _going to wake up" I say harshly "so there was no reason for you to tell me that. And if she did feel that way why didn't she let you die instead of making herself suffer?"

"You don't think I'm asking myself that question?" says Caleb. "She loved me. Enough to hold me at gunpoint to die for me, I don't know why, but that's the way things are."

Without giving me a chance to respond he walks away and maybe it's better that way because no words can possibly match the anger that bubbles within me. I sit on the ground, in the middle of the lobby, as I blink away tears.

I sit in silence, thinking.

Sometime later I hear voices approaching me- Cara and Peter.

"This was a sculpture that symbolized gradual change" she informs him.

"Oh really, why?" asks an eager Peter.

"If its okay I'll explain later" she says. Do you know how to get back to the dormitory?"

"Yeah"

"Then go there for a while someone will help you."

Cara walks up to me and I try to prepare for her voice, but all she does is sit next to me. She watches as Reggie stands beneath the gushing water.

"You don't need to be here" I say

"The quiet is nice and I don't have anywhere to be." She says.

So we sit there staring at the water in silence.

"There you are" Christina says, quickly walking toward us. Her face is swollen and her voice replicates a heavy sigh.

"It's time. They're unplugging him."

I shudder at the sound of that word, but I get up and follow her anyway. Ever since we arrived Hana and Zeke have hovered over Uriah's body, their eyes searching for life. But all that is left of him is a machine beating his heart.

Christina and I walk in front of Cara as we approach the hospital. Christina and I don't speak but I know both of our thoughts are fixed on Uriah and his last breaths.

We get to the observation window and Evelyn is there- Amar picked her up in my behalf, a few days ago. She tries to comfort me, but I yank away.

Inside the room Zeke and Hana both hold one of Uriah's hands. A doctor stands by the heart monitor, a clipboard held out, but not Hana or Zeke, but _David_. Who sits hunched over and dazed in his wheelchair, like all the others who have had their memories taken from them.

"What is _he_ doing here?" I say. I feel the fire burning within me.

From Behind me Cara speaks, "he is technically still the leader of the bureau, until they replace him." She says "Tobias, he doesn't remember anything. He is not the person you knew. That David is as good as dead."

"Shut up!" I snap. David signs the clipboard and turns to leave the room. As the door opens I can't resist the urge, I lunge at him, and it is only Evelyn who stops me from attacking.

"Calm Down, Tobias" says Evelyn.

I turn to face the room. There Zeke and Hana join hands over Uriah's body. I can see Hana saying something, but I can't hear her. Did the dauntless have prayers for the dying? In Abnegation death was reacted to with silence, not words. My anger drifts away and is replaced by grief for Uriah, whose smile lingers in my head, alive, humorous and happy. Not only was he my friend's brother, but my friend.

With only a flick of a few switches the machine stops making Uriah live. Zeke begins shaking and Hana squeezes his hand until her knuckles are white.

She then says something and steps back from the body, letting Uriah go.

I move away from the window walking, then running carelessly, aimlessly, blindly.


	6. Chapter 56

I am preparing to go and take a truck to the city when Christina runs toward me. Her face is puffy and here are bags under her eyes. She hasn't slept since they unplugged Uriah the other day.

"The nurse told me to find you." She says "I don't know what it's about, except that it's urgent."

She turns to walk toward the hospital, and without thinking about it I follow her. I haven't seen Tris in days, not since the incident, it's just too hard. I can't stand there and see my Tris without hearing her. I can't stand to see her suffer, but not be able to help her or save her. Christina takes me to Tris's room, where the nurse is waiting. Christina sits down beside Tris, where she has been for days. Tris is pale and the only movement I see her make is the rising and falling of her chest on her otherwise motionless body. I grind the heels of my hands into my eyes, like I'm trying to push the tears back into my skull.

"Please follow me." Says the nurse, heading to the door.

I silently follow her. I don't know what information she could possibly tell me other than, other than, they want to unplug her. They can't it has only been nine days. I can't loose her, not now, not ever. I shove my hand into my pocket and feel the cool glass of the vial. Then I remember what I was about to do. Now I know I will have to do it. There will be no way I could go on like this forever. Then I realize they would need confirmation from Caleb too, but he was nowhere to be seen. What could this possibly be about? The nurse walks into a small office and sits behind a desk. I stand hesitantly in the doorway.

"You can't do this; it has only been nine days!" I say harshly, the anger bubbling up within me "I won't"

"This is not about that, Tobias." She interrupts me in a relaxed tone. "Now if you will cooperate can you please close the door and take a seat?" She pointed to the chair across from her.

I released the vial, which I had unconsciously formed a fist around. Obeying her, I sit, perplexed.

"I have been informed that you and Tris have a close relationship, is this information correct?" She says

"Why is this relevant" I try to reply as calmly as I can.

"This information is necessary concerning Tris's health. If you care about her you will tell me, now were you and Tris in a relationship? And if so have you had sexual intercourse with her?" she asks roughly.

"This information is currently irrelevant, but if you can explain yourself I may have an answer." I say letting her hear the anger in my voice.

My leg is now shaking. Why is she concerned about this information?

"Some of Tris's blood tests show that she could"

The door swings open and Christina stands in its frame. Her eyes are watering.

"She's awake." She cries.

The vial in my pocket falls into the trash.

* * *

_BTW think memory serum!_


	7. Chapter 57

**Tris**

I open my eyes and there is a bright white light that makes it hard to see. I look around for my mother, or David. This is not the weapons lab, _where am I_? I see a dark blur move across the room and go out what I believe is a door. My head feels funny and I hear something that might be a beep. Am I _dead_? I blink my eyes trying to clear the blurry whiteness that surrounds me. I am in a room in the hospital that looks like Uriah's but this isn't Uriah's room, its mine. The only thing I can remember is pressing the green button and seeing my mom. She pulled me into her arms and embraced me. She held me and told me I was done; _why am I here_?

I pressed the button, was the serum released? Did the plan work? What happened to my friends, where is Caleb, what happened to _Tobias_? Millions of questions I do not have answers to run through my mind. What happened to me?

I know I was shot, but I don't know where. Tubes and wires are connected to me. I feel drowsy and lightheaded. There's a throbbing pain in the side of my head. When I try to move a sharp pain and the feeling of resistance shoots up my leg, I can't move it. I throw the blankets off of myself and wince when I feel pain in my arm. There is a hard plaster covering my left leg. It goes from the top of my leg to my ankle, not allowing me to bend my knee.

"_Tris_?" someone calls, its Tobias.

A group of people rush into the room.

"Tris," Tobias says, crouching next to me. His face is pale, almost yellow.

There is too much I have to say. But the first thing that comes out is, "Beatrice."

He weakly laughs.

"Beatrice," he amends, and touches his lips to mine. My fingers curl into his shirt.

* * *

Who remembers what the last part of this chapter is taken from?

vote for what you want Ana and I to write next!

~Bri


	8. Chapter 58

**Tris**

I feel aware of everything at once, the pressure of his lips, the taste of our kiss, the texture of his skin and the orange light glowing against my closed eyelids. I pull away and he opens his eyes, and I see everything about them, the dart of light blue in his left eye, the dark blue that makes me feel like I'm safe inside it, like I'm dreaming.

"I love you" I say.

"I love you, too." He says.

"Did it work?"

"Yes." He says as a smile spreads across his face, but it doesn't reach his eyes.

* * *

Tobias hasn't left the room since I woke up. He insisted on staying even when the doctors asked to step out. We are finally alone. He brings the chair he was sitting in closer to the bed and he runs a hand through my hair.

"What's this all about?" I ask motioning to my leg, "They wouldn't do this if we were back in Dauntless."

"Although David just missed your head, and your arm he got your leg, but this is a bit to the extreme." He says.

"So what did I miss?" I ask.

"Well, Evelyn chose me instead of her power and Johanna is letting people choose if they want to say or leave Chicago..." Tobias fills me in on everything that happened in the past nine days. Nine days, wow, I was asleep for nine days. I watch Tobias dark eyes as he speaks and now I know; now I know why I keep on living.


	9. Epilogue

**TWO AND A HALF YEARS LATER**

**Tobias**

Evelyn stands at the border where two world meet. Tire tracks are now worn into the ground from the frequent coming and going of people from the fringe moving in and out, or former bureau members commuting back and forth. Her bag rests against her leg, in one of the wells of the earth. When I'm close she raises a hand to greet me.

When she gets into the truck she kisses my cheek, and I allow her to. A smile creeps across my face and I let it stay there.

"Welcome back" I say.

The agreement that I offered to her over two years ago, and when she made it again with Johanna was that she would leave the city. Now, so much has changed in Chicago that I don't see any harm in her return, and neither does she. Even though two years have passed she looks younger, her face fuller and her smile wider.

"How are you?" she says.

"I'm… doing well," I say. "It was a hard adjustment."

I glance at the baby seats in the behind me. We were scared and Tris was devastated when we found out, we had just gone through so much and considering our ages we wouldn't have been prepared even if we hadn't just fought a war. Today would have been choosing day, it's also their birthday.

Evelyn puts a hand on my shoulder and looks out at the fields. The crops that once only occupied the fields around Amity headquarters have spread, and continue to spread through all the grassy spaces around the city. Sometimes I miss the desolate, empty spaces. But right now I don't mind driving through rows of corn and wheat. I see people around the crops, checking the soil with devices designed by former bureau scientists. They wear green and blue and pink and yellow.

"What is it like, living without the factions?" Evelyn says.

"It's kind of ordinary," I say. I smile at her. "You'll love it."

I take Evelyn to our apartment just north of the river. It's on one of the lower floors, but I can see a wide stretch of buildings through the abundant windows. Tris and I were some of the first few settlers in the new Chicago, so we got to choose where we lived. Zeke, Shauna, Christina, Amar, and George opted to live in the higher floors of the Hancock building, and Caleb and Cara both moved back to the apartments near Millennium park, but Tris and I came here because it is beautiful and nowhere near our old homes.

"My neighbor is a history expert, and he came from the fringe," I say as I look for my keys. "He calls Chicago 'the fourth city' -because it was first destroyed by fire, then the Purity war, and now we are at the fourth attempt of settlement here."

"The fourth city, I like it." Evelyn says as I push the door open.

There's not a lot of furniture inside, just a couch, some chairs, a kitchen, but toys and baby things are scattered all over the place. Tris is in the kitchen making food for later as Will and Natalie chase each other around. Sunlight winks in the windows of the building across the marshy river. Former Bureau members are trying to return the lake to its former glory, but it will take some time.

Natalie trips on the carpet and I pick her up right as she begins to cry. But when I tickle her tummy she giggles and tries to squirm out of my arms. I put her on the floor and she continues to run circles around the apartment with her brother.

Evelyn drops her bag on the couch. "Thanks for letting me stay with you guys for a little while. I promise I'll find another place to stay soon."

"Hello, Evelyn," Says Tris. "It really isn't a problem."

I know Tris isn't too happy about her staying here, but I'm nervous about her being here too. Poking through our meager possessions, shuffling down our hallways, But Tris and I agreed that we can't stay distant forever. Not when I promised I'd bridge the gap we had between Evelyn and myself.

"George says he needs some help training a police force," Evelyn says. "Neither of you offered?"

"No," I say. "I told you we're done with guns, plus Tris and I have a lot going on."

"That's right, you're using your _words_ now," Evelyn says, wrinkling her nose. "I don't trust politicians, you know."

"You'll trust me, because I'm your son," I say. "Anyway, I'm not a politician. Not yet, anyway. I'm just an assistant."

Though she tries to be discrete about it I notice Tris is listening and Evelyn sits at the table looking around, twitchy and spry, like a cat.

"Do you know where your father is?" Evelyn says.

I shrug.

"Someone told me that he left," says Tris "But they didn't tell me where he went."

"Oh" I say.

Evelyn rests her chin on her hand. "There's nothing you wanted to say to him? Nothing at all?"

"No" I say. I turn around when I hear a loud noise, but it's just Will knocking down a block tower. I twist my keys around my finger. "I just wanted to leave him behind me, where he belongs."

When I stood in front of him in the park two years ago with the snow falling around us, I realized that attacking him in front of the Dauntless in the Merciless Mart didn't make me feel better about the pain that he caused me, insulting or yelling at him wouldn't either. And the only option left was letting go.

Evelyn gives me a strange look then goes to the couch where she left her bag. She opens it and takes out a blue, glass object that looks like water, suspended in time.

I remember when she gave it to me. I was young, but old enough to realize that it was forbidden in the Abnegation faction, a useless and therefore self- indulgent object. When I asked her its purpose she said _it doesn't do anything obvious. But it might be able to do something in here._ She touched her heart, _Beautiful things sometimes do._

For years it was a symbol of defiance, a small refusal to be obedient, made by my mother and I. Even though in my mind she was dead. I hid it under my bed and when I decided to leave Abnegation I placed it on my desk so my father could see it, see both my strength and hers.

"When you were gone this reminded me of you" she says clutching it to her stomach. "It reminded me of how brave you were, and have always been." She smiles. "I thought you could keep it here. I intended for you to have it after all.

I smile and nod.

**Tris**

I watch Evelyn and Tobias and listen to them talk. But I don't join in on the conversation so they can catch up. I wasn't too enthusiastic about Evelyn coming to stay with us, and I didn't trust her from the start, but she and Tobias have some holes to patch and she hasn't met Will and Natalie yet. I watch as Tobias brings them to meet her one at a time. Will hugs her and lets her give him a kiss on the cheek, while Natalie hides behind Tobias not letting her touch her.

"Natalie, she won't bite" I say.

Tobias, Evelyn and I share a laugh.

* * *

I hear the doorbell ring and run to open it. Christina stands with Zeke, and Shauna who sits in the wheelchair with a blanket over her lap. She has a better wheelchair now, one without handles on the back so she can maneuver it more easily. Matthew stands behind them.

"Hi" I say.

Christina smiles at me. And hands me a box.

"Here's the cake!" she says. I take it and lead everyone into the apartment where will runs around giving out hugs and Natalie still stand behind Tobias holding on to his leg. The room fills with chatter as everyone catches up and greets each other. I peek inside the box the cake is chocolate- or dauntless as most of us here call it.

Shauna clears her voice and everyone turns their attention to her.

"Got something to show you," she says, she tosses the blanket onto the couch, revealing complicated metal braces on her legs. They go all the way up to her hips and wrap around her belly. She smiles at everyone and with a gear grinding sound, her feet shift to the floor in front of the chair and she stands.

I smile, and so does Tobias.

"Well look at that," says Tobias, "I forgot how tall you were."

"That's amazing, Shauna" I say.

"Caleb and his lab friends made them for me" She says. "I'm still getting the hang of it, but they say one day I might be able to run"

"Nice" says Tobias "Where is he, anyway?"

"He called to tell me he will be a little late." I say.

The doorbell rings again, and when I open the door Cara gives me a quick hug and says "How are you I haven't seen you in so long!" Her hair is in a tight braid.

Cara and Caleb work in the laboratories compound together, which are now a small segment of the Department of Agriculture, which helps to make agriculture more efficient and capable of feeding more people. Matthew works in a psychiatric research somewhere in the city- he said he was working on something about memory. Christina works in an office with me that helps relocate people in the fringe that want to move into the city. Zeke and Amar are police and George trains the police force- Dauntless jobs is what Tobias and I think of them. And Tobias works as an assistant to the city's representative in government: Johanna Reyes.

I walk over to where Tobias is talking and put my head on his shoulder. I look around and see that Will is playing with Evelyn and Christina has Natalie.

"Any updates from Peter?" Asks Tobias

"He's in Milwaukee" Matthew says. "I don't know what he's doing, though."

Cara turns around from where she was talking to Shauna. "He's working in an office somewhere," She says "I think it's good for him."

"I always thought he would join the GD rebels in the Fringe" Zeke says, "Shows you what I know.

"Me too" I agree.

"He's different now" Cara says with a shrug.

There are still some GD's in the Fringe that believe the only way to get the change we want is another war. I believe that we can work for change without violence. I have had enough violence to last me a lifetime, sometimes I still have nightmares, but Tobias is always there to comfort me.

After Caleb arrives we sing happy birthday and eat the cake. I can't believe they are already two.

"Hey, Four hasn't been zip lining, yet" Zeke says to me.

"Yeah, and that's something I want him to do."

* * *

Happy Holidays!

Sorry I haven't updated in a while, I didn't find time during Christmas!

I hope you liked this story.

**If** **you** **want me** **to write more** **please write a review** **telling me if you want to know** **about:**

**A. What happened between my epilogue and ending**

**or**

**B. a story after the epilogue**

**I have ideas for both!**

**You see Tris really would have wanted him to spread her ashes zip lining!**

Thanks for reading!

-Bri


	10. authors note

Hello People!

Ana and I have just started to write our next story which will take place between the epilogue and my ending of the book. We are deciding on a title and still need to finish the first chapter. I get annoyed when people update with only authors notes so I promise I won't do this again! Next time there is an update it will be to tell you that we posted the next story!

~Bri


End file.
